Why We Worry

Do you know anyone that doesn’t worry?  We all worry, but have you ever wondered why we worry?  You will probably acknowledge that worrying  really doesn’t do anything, but,  you still do it.  

The reason you worry (be prepared to feel silly) is that we are all fanatic about getting things right, so, like a good fan, we act like we have control, or at least influence, over things that we have absolutely no control over.  You have never actually aided your favorite sports team from your living room sofa (Steeler fans excluded). We worry because it gives us a false sense of control over things we value but have no control over. But, the positive reinforcement of worry doesn’t stop there.  If our team wins, we associate our worry with a good outcome. However, if they lose, we boldly pronounce, “I knew it!”, because, of course,  we’ve been worried about that from the beginning of the game or season.  Worry, what a predicament!

But wait, there is some perception of gain for everyone in worrying.  When you worry, it makes others think you care.  You don’t even actually have to do anything. Just dramatize your stress and others will believe you care.  If you don’t worry,

people might conclude that you don’t care, even if you did everything you could and now you’re just relaxing and accepting your limits.  Big worriers get the most reinforcement for worrying because they worry about everything and 99% of the time, nothing happens!  So, they associate worrying  with hundreds of good outcomes.

The good news about Enlight…….It treats this “cultural insanity” too.  Believe it or not, you CAN stop this useless behavior.