The other day I was talking to my wife about cognitive-behavioral therapy. Now, keep in mind that my wife is an experienced court reporter so I wasn't expecting any great insights on psychotherapy. Well, I was wrong...
While explaining a bit of the theory behind this approach, she interrupted me saying, “Hey! I don’t need anyone to tell me that if I eat too much and don’t exercise, I’m going to be fat. I know that already, and I know what behavior will make me lose weight: eat less and exercise. What I don’t know is why I don’t do it. “ (Actually she is in great shape. )
She makes such an excellent point. Many people have insight to their problem. An addict oftentimes knows that they are out of control and that they need to stop their behavior or there could be a tragic outcome. Most people who have a phobia of spiders would admit that they know spiders can't hurt them and that is why they are embarrassed about the phobia. The truth is that knowing the rational truth -- that panicking and overeating are not helpful or good for us -- doesn’t always stop us from overeating or panicking.
So what is motivating us? Well, it turns out that it is our feelings. Feelings are very powerful motivators and guess what? They don’t have to make a lick of sense. Of course, we can fight feelings with facts, but the truth is facts don’t always win, even when we know the facts. What many people need is not a cognitive intervention, but an emotional intervention. It’s the emotional mind, not the rational mind, that has the disorder. Most people with a problem can actually give really good advice to others. Their reasoning is sound but their personal feelings (cravings, anxiety, fear, insecurity) are sick.
So, where do these feelings come from and how is it that they are so inconsistent with what is true and proportionate? The answer is that they come from our past. Each of us has an emotional software program written throughout our personal development. The problem is that for the first 18 years or so, the program was written by a child. We, as adults, make many inaccurate conclusions as well, but it all adds up to an emotional disposition. These emotional influences interact with our rational minds and sometimes overcome it. What we’ve come to “believe” about ourselves can become a long-term belief that it is not easily corrected by the more recent discovery of the facts. However, because this software program is subtle energy and information, energy psychology applications such as EnlightTM work very well to correct this long history of misconception. Cognitive therapy for the rational mind combined with Enlight for the emotional mind can reprogram your outdated software to allow you to live a richer, fuller life.